A – Z Challenge – F is for….

well,..   yes F *is* for the big F-word but I actually very rarely swear (it’s way more effective when I do as people know I’m really serious!).
So my F-word is Family.

I have the best family of anyone I know; I have a better family than people I don’t know too. It was many years before I realised that not all families were like mine -  I thought ours was “normal”  but as I got older and heard people talk about their families, their family disputes, dysfunctions and estrangements I realised that my family is actually quite abnormal.   Post-teenage years we’ve never had any arguments or falling outs; ….  no one has spent years not talking to any one else.   No-one has been disinherited;  no-one has disowned the family.

Perhaps it comes from being a small family…  my father was an only child; mother was one of two girls.  Mum & dad doubled themselves with 4 kids whilst mum’s sister married and had 2 children who have no kids so their line stops there.

We four produced eleven and two of those are now married.   It is truly wonderful when we all get together – there are so many laughs.  We don’t touch on many “heavy” personal subjects but I know that I could rely on any of them if I needed to.  We don’t tend to ask much of each other though and we can be like a super secret branch of the CIA  – sharing only what needs to be shared on a need-to-know basis.   This can be a frustrating but it’s now just an accepted quirk of our family.

I think all of us have great respect for each other and we genuinely like each other.  Even our next generation displays this respect and liking for their elders, siblings and cousins.

Pretty amazing really!

This is the last time we were all together -  September 201o for my father’s 79th birthday.   Only 2 of his grandchildren were missing that day.    I hope he makes it to his 80th (I already have my plane ticket home) and I hope there is a full contingent for the photo…

The people I grew up with

The patriarch with 9 of his 11 grandchildren and two grand-daughters-in-law:

Dee Why Beach

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I grew up in middle-of-nowhere-town in the state of NSW, but every year between Christmas and New Year we would undertake an odyssey to Sydney to holiday at the beach.

We 4 kids would squish across the back seat of the station wagon, there was a overloaded luggage rack on the top and the little section behind the back seat would hold an esky full of sandwiches and drinks for the journey, and, our family dog (a doberman who would return to her breeder’s kennel for her own little holiday).  One year we even took some poor teenage girl along to help my mother when Cat was a toddler.  I really have no idea where she sat but suspect that one of us kids had to sit in that back section with the dog.  It was in the pre-seatbelt days anyway.

It would be hot as hell, (no airconditioning) the tarp covering the luggage would develop a sail bubble at some stage and thrash loudly about above our heads, there was no radio reception for most of the way and there was a lot of squabbling in the back.  My father would swear a lot and threaten to turn around for about the first 4 hours.

The journey would take anywhere between 8 and 10 hours and must have been truly torturous for my parents.  But, the instant we saw the ocean a transformation occurred and we were all happy little campers.

For many years we stayed in holiday homes between Manly and Narrabeen Lakes but for the last 5 years of our family vacations we stayed in the same house in Dee Why. (when I was about 17 our parents decided to move the annual vacation to various spots around Nelson Bay).

The origin of the name Dee Why is not definitively known -  the first reference found to it was a pencil note in surveyor James Meehan’s field book “Wednesday, 27th Sept, 1815 Dy Beach – Marked a Honey Suckle Tree near the Beach”.   From 1840 the name was recorded as one word “Deewhy” but was split in two during the 1950′s

As a continuation of her birthday celebration I took the Princess and her Godmother, Kate, to lunch at Dee Why beach:

View from the table to the water: 

After a delightful lunch we walked some of it off along the concourse and beach:   

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.   Rocks  – there’s a pool in there: 

My cousins used to live in this house on top of the cliff.   Before there were too many siblings we used to stay with them.  There were many, many, many steps from the roadway to their house so I’m sure my mother was happy when we stopped staying there.   Back in the old days the house used to have bright orange trim!   The cousins kept goats which used to roam over those green areas – this was my first experience with goat milk (yuk) and goat’s cheese (yum)

It was a little cold so there were very few in the water…  you are meant to swim between the flags because this is usually the safest area and the area where the Lifesvers are meant to run out and save you as you go under for the last time.  My father used to insist that we go to the beach every day no matter what the weather was ….  there must be some family photos out there of four little very goose-bumped kids! 

Princess turns 21 …..

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The fact that the Princess was turning 21 this month was a major factor in me deciding to cash in some of the Manservant’s frequent flyer miles and visit home for September.

Today is the Princess’s birthday -  if I was back in DC I would dredge up some baby photos and post them to compare the baby to the adult.   You will just have to take my word that she was a real cutie and after 2 boys it was nice to have a little human that I could dress up!

The people in her office made a big fuss of her:

When I was out looking for a card I found the perfect one -  I’m sure I made a squeal of delight when I saw this one as I’ve been referring to her as the Princess from the beginning of those “delightful” teenage years: 

One of her brothers gave her a box that contained some hand selected Lindt chocolates and money:

She did not want a party (thank goodness!) – just a family dinner at an extremely popular Italian restaurant.  From the left we have: Miss A (my daughter in law),  my sons the Locksmith and the Economist,  Emjay, absent behind the camera Manservant,  the Princess and her boyfriend Nick. 

The food was great -  I had lamb cutlets – yeah,  I know that doesn’t sound very Italian but when I see lamb on a menu that’s usually what I order because I have it so rarely.   My two sons shared a half-metre pizza! (they have metre long pizzas too)

The end of the night for Emjay  (& the Manservant)  -  the youngsters continued onto a nightclub while they were still young enough to enjoy it!  

A visit to the Oldies

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A visit to my parents always makes me feel like running out and joining a gym.  And then hiring a Dietician.

As most of you know my father had a massive stroke when he was only 54 years old and has been paralyzed down one side for 25 years. For many years he could shuffle around using a walking stick but time and a general decline in health and strength eventually put him into a Go-Chair (a type of indoor scooter) to get around the house.

My mother uses a walker to get around but that doesn’t stop her from speeding!  I’m pretty amazed at how fast she goes with that thing.

They live in a retirement village which is referred to as a “resort” in the brochures.   It is a collection of fully independent homes – there was meant to be further development to include a nursing home and hospital – but those have not eventuated yet.  There is a nurse on duty 24 hours to assist anyone who has a problem.

The houses all have huge light switches, low down door handles, rails and a “help” button in most of the rooms.  I asked my parents if they think they are the most frequent users of the help button because I hear plenty of stories of the nurse having to come over.

They are on first name basis with the ambulance crew – not because they are ill often and have to be carted off to hospital, but because they fall a lot and the ambulance has to be called to get them upright (and checked out).

We had a really enjoyable visit with them but they will be exhausted today – that’s why I restrict my visits to a day at a time.  We will have a few more day trips up there while we are here.

It really is lovely to see them but I always leave there feeling a bit frightened for my own future!  (and making plans in my head for a healthier lifestyle).

I think I know why the manservant might be a tad nervous in a car with me.  It’s not so much that we are driving on the left;  it’s that I’m driving on the left and taking photos at the same time!   The Freeway going north at 7am was basically deserted:

Dappled roadway from the freeway into the little seaside hamlet where they live:

All the houses in the “resort”  look very similar: 

But there are some nice water features:

My mother gets plenty of time to do her scrapbooking -  she is doing our family trees in scrapbook form and they are simply beautiful:

My father enjoys just pottering around with his pot plants  – he can do this while sitting in his go-chair:

On the way back we detoured off the freeway and dawdled through Karuah which sits on the Karuah River prompting the manservant to comment that at least you only had to remember the name of your town to know which river you are on:

We drove down beside the river and found some graffiti:  

And oyster racks: 

They sell freshly shucked oysters from the back of the shed:

Karuah used to be a stopping point on the highway but then the Freeway was built which bypassed the town and now business is not so thriving: 

The RSL Club looked to be the busiest place in town and I think it’s always better to have live entertainment than dead!   I also love that the building paint is the same colour as the sky!

And just to test that you are still looking  – here is a photo of me and dad –

Mike’s Day

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My dad was born in 1931 in St Peter Port on the island of Guernsey.  His real name is Max but he was so small and sickly when he was born that there was some doubt as to whether he would survive, so the nurses nicknamed him Mickey after little Mickey Mouse.   He was an only child.  He was evacuated to Cornwall, England, during WW2 when the Germans occupied the islands.  At the end of the war he returned to Guernsey.  

As a young man with adventure in his heart and only a few pounds in his pocket he ran away from home … by boarding a ship headed for Canada via the Indian Ocean.  He was sidetracked when he met an Aussie on board and got off the boat in Sydney, Australia.  He never has been to Canada.

He had a massive stroke when he was about 54 years old and only that same sheer will to survive he had as a baby got him through and to the present day.  At the time of his stroke doctors told us it was highly unlikely he would survive – the same as his parents were told all those years ago.

He is a cranky old man but he is filled with an incredible determination to beat the odds.   

Today is his birthday:

Dad A2

 

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Mother’s Day

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It's Mother's Day!  I got all my text messages from Australia yesterday because if they don't do it then, the kids forget on (their) Monday.  I also received some beautiful flowers.

My sister has most of our old family photographs so I don't have any of my young mother except a few I took myself.  My first camera was a little Kodak Instamatic.   Here is the family in 1965  – of course I am behind the lens so I am not in the photo: 

FAmily 1965

This is a photo which was taken by my grandfather and which my mother "coloured".  It was taken before my mother & father went on an overseas trip (to visit his mother) and all four kids were given one of mum & dad so we remembered what they looked like!  I have had mine on display in a duo-frame since I was given them in 1974.   

Mum 1974 a

Here is me as a mummy.   The Princess was being held by her father in the photo – but as he is an ex,  I have deleted the majority of him! 

Mummy Me 1990a

And here are three generations of mums,  Mum, Nan & Me; and the little Princess makes 4 generations of women in that family. My grandmother lived to be 99.  This photo was taken about 1992.

Four Generations0001a

I hope all mothers have a wonderful day.

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